by Georgeann Wearin

Hyannis, Neb.

The drought conditions and hot weather have had a strange affect on my yard. Strangely enough, it has turned it into a Garden of Eden.

My yard is the only place for miles that gets any water. I diligently set sprinklers day and night to keep my new grass growing and the old grass nice and green. It has become a lush oasis amidst the dry desert of Sandhills around us.

Therein lies my problem. Every animal around has come to enjoy the shade and water that my yard provides. I have to fight for survival the minute I set foot outside.

The swallows have decided to build a nest right above my front door. They eat well from a buffet of bugs, which are drawn to the porch light. They cool off in the sprinkler and drink dew from the flower garden below them. Our yard has all the “creature” comforts for them. I, however, have to wear a helmet when I go outside.

Those pesky swallows dive bomb me and drop their waste with expert aim. I have recently sunk to attacking them with a hose as they approach. I sure hope nobody drives in as I take aim at a swallow with my hose and scream!

The snakes have also decided to come to my Eden. How appropriate. It seems they are after the mice that are after the bugs. Ugh! Like their ancestor of old, they lurk about waiting to scare the heck out of me. The slimy reptiles make the dogs crazy and keep my husband on the run as I yell for him to “get the hoe”! It’s such a chore.

Toads have also discovered my Paradise and instead of seeing one or two around we now have millions. (Okay, maybe I’m exaggerating a bit.) We have to watch our every step. There’s nothing quite like the feeling of stepping on a toad in the dark with bare feet. I dream about warts at night! Oh, the stress of it all.

I guess that’s just the price I have to pay to keep my yard green and growing. It dawned on me yesterday as I was lugging hoses around keeping an eye out for snakes and swatting at swallows that I keep it growing…why? So I can spend an entire day mowing and trimming it? So much for Paradise!