Our “NEW Folksong Contest” is scheduled for Feb. 21, 2009, here in Big Timber. A new folksong means writing on any subject of current interest, but doing so in the old-fashioned manner so it can be played on one’s preferred acoustic instrument.

I won’t be entering the contest as I’m ramrodding the event. The whole idea of “new” folksongs came about because in my dotage, I’ve taken up guitar pickin’, folksingin’ and song writin’. I can’t play worth a darn and I warble somewhere in the neighborhood of the tune ” sometimes. But as the feller says, “Dang, this here pickin’ ‘n grinnin’ ‘n sangin’ shore is fun.” So, stand back, get outta the way, hold on to whatever you like best because I’m comin’ out of the chute with my own “new” folksong collection titled, Gwen’s Medicine Show.

Here’s lyrics to one of the songs:

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Flat Feet & Fungus, and! I Drool!

When I was young and full of vim

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I thought I was so cool

I’d mount my horse,

salute the crowd

Now it’s flat feet and fungus, and! I drool!

Chorus…

Oh, it’s pills, pills, pills

For all my aches and ills

Oh, it’s pills, pills, pills

I gotta take them pills.

When others told me I’d get old

I thought they were fools

I paid no mind,

I was too young

Now it’s flat feet & fungus, and! I drool!

Chorus…

Oh, it’s pills, pills, pills

For all my aches and ills

Oh, it’s pills, pills, pills

I gotta take them pills.

My friend’s the local pharmacist

He counts out pills like they were jewels

Gems to cure old age ills

Like flat feet & fungus, and! I drool!

Chorus…

Oh, it’s pills, pills, pills

For all my aches and ills

Oh, it’s pills, pills, pills

I gotta take them pills.

Collections of empty bottles

Remind me what they do “

Lower blood pressure, kick-start thyroid,

Fix flat feet & fungus, and! I drool!

Chorus…

Oh, it’s pills, pills, pills

For all my aches and ills

Oh, it’s pills, pills, pills

I gotta take them pills.

Before I’m planted in the dirt

Before you say adieu

Dump all them pills into my grave

With my flat feet & fungus, and! my drool!

Chorus…

Oh, it’s pills, pills, pills

For all my aches and ills

Oh, it’s pills, pills, pills

I gotta take them pills.