Mad Jack Hanks: Tales from the O-NO Ranch 11-7-11 | TheFencePost.com

Mad Jack Hanks: Tales from the O-NO Ranch 11-7-11

Mad Jack Hanks
Wellington, Colo.

Gentle readers, I would almost bet that most of you, if not all of you, have gotten a good “head-knockin’ in your lifetime. Right?

Well, maybe not. I think that maybe at some point in my life, I will escape without any more scrapes, bruises or knots on my noggin’. Being a rather tall person it seems almost easy at times for me to not duck when it would be most appropriate. Like, well, just the other day when I was workin’ on the old Alice Chambers, my red headed tractor girlfriend. Her hydraulic pump went out during this first snowstorm of the season. Of course it worked like a champ all summer, but you know, Murphey’s law. Actually, ole Alice had absolutely nothing to do with me getting a good portion of the top of my head scraped off. I should have banged my head any number of times workin’ on the old gal as the bucket on the tractor was down and the pump is on the front of the tractor leaving only a small space about 4-feet tall, 3-feet wide and 5-feet across – I’m 6-foot-3.

The tractor was outside in the snow and all the snow had turned to ice so it was a perfect time and place to bang my head. Nope, not there. I was in the garage getting a tool and turned and at a rather swift pace I was headed back to the tractor. I simply forgot that I had not raised that particular garage door all the way up and I was looking back for some undetermined reason when I hit the door. I was wearin’ a hat and hit the rubber bottom on the door. Just the same I saw Tweety Bird fly by at least twice before I quit cussin’.

Ole Clancy the wonder dog, had already headed for the creek a quarter mile away. I peeled off enough hide to make a kid’s saddle. Of course you know that couldn’t be true. Actually, I got caught telllin’ the truth one time and it took me a good 20 minutes to lie my way out of it! Just the same, I did peel off a good chunk of hide.

I slightly remember that time back on the LX Ranch at Amarillo trying to shut a trailer gate on a nasty old sister but she managed to kick the pipe gate right smack dab into the area right above my right eye. I was on my back before I knew what had happened. Saw that little ole Tweety Bird a few time then.

There have been so many times I just don’t remember them all and don’t want to. I know as I get older chances are I will not be a flexible as I am now and the odds are against me for not being able to avoid any more “head-knockin.” As I ruminate on it now, it appears that I ain’t all that flexible at present. Oh well, whatcha’ gonna’ do. It is what it is.

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Stay tuned, check yer cinch on occasion and I’ll c. y’all, all y’all.