Being a redneck | TheFencePost.com

Being a redneck

TALES FROM THE ONO RANCH
Mad Jack Hanks

Gentle readers, I remember the first time I realized that I was indeed a redneck. Yep, sure do and it was a little embarrassing to say the least. It was like this: I was spending my two weeks of active duty at Fort Hood, Texas, as an Army reservist. A buddy and I went into Dallas for the weekend which we had off. I was single then and runnin' loose and jumpin' fences. While there we met a couple of young ladies that were flight attendants for Braniff Airways. After some partying on Friday night these girls ask me if I would like to go with them downtown to shop. "Sure, why not," thought I. "What could go wrong?" I ask myself. All went well until they decided they wanted to go into Neman and Marcus to shop. I was stopped at the door and told I couldn't come in as I didn't have on a sport coat and tie.

"WHAT! YA GOTTA' BE KIDDIN' ME," thought I. "You can rent a coat and tie from us if you want to accompany these ladies, otherwise, I can't allow you in!" said the stern butler looking icon. I waited outside, redneck and all.

I have always been a redneck as well as all of my family. Now my mother would never ever admit that she or anyone she knew in our family had that redneck.

To my way of thinking, anyone, man or woman who works inside or outside but leans into putting a real value on family, hard work, God, a day's pay for a day's work and they may or may not speak the king's English, most likely not, would fit the profile of a redneck.

“After some partying on Friday night these girls ask me if I would like to go with them downtown to shop. ‘Sure, why not,’ thought I. ‘What could go wrong?’ I ask myself.”

Recommended Stories For You

Some would say and have said that we are DEPLORABLE, AND NOT REDEEMABLE! What's up with that? Like I've said in the past, "I think we are ADORABLE AND REMARKABLE! As an example: Baxter Black on the Tonight Show with Johnny Carson all those years ago. Those folks there thought they had discovered a new species of humans. Funny rednecks that presented themselves in such a way they had a hard time digesting it all. Johnny went bonkers with "laffin" and his facial expressions said it all. We're proud of you Bax for unwrapping "redneckism" on national television. Then there is my friend Lee Pitts whom on many occasions was quoted on the radio by none other than Paul Harvey. What a man Mr. Harvey was and he had to have some red on his neck to reach out to Lee and Doc. Blakely, down in Texas for their redneck, down to earth prospective opinions.

As for me, well, I am an old white man with a red neck who is mindful of little children, old dogs and old horses! Little kids will stare at me on many occasions with my black cowboy hat, big mustache, and a twinkle in my eye when we make eye contact. I love it. I don't know what is going through their little minds, I can only hope their future holds some rednecks in it to give them common sense approaches to this goofy world we live in.

Stay tuned, check yer cinch on occasion, live to love and love to live and make every day an adventure and I'll c. yall, all y'all. ❖