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I SEEM TO HAVE MISPLACED MY “GIVE A HOOT”

Tales From the O-No Ranch
Mad Jack Hanks
Wellington, Colo.
onoranch@msn.com

Gentle readers have you ever just felt as if you didn’t have the energy or desire to do anything at all? Nada?

This morning was one of those mornings for me. It took me back to those “two a day” football workouts in the late summer before school started. That second morning of those workouts were tough to navigate even for a 17-year-old who loved the sport of football. My plan for the morning was to get up, change the sheets on the bed, put on the coffee, feed my ponies and then eat breakfast. After a good breakfast my plan was to saddle up and go for a cool morning ride, check the fences and take a look at the condition of my pastures and of course look over the few head I had here this summer. I talked myself out of going for a ride. I was havin’ a “pity party” because I didn’t have a muscle or bone in my old body that didn’t hurt. Plus all that, my pony is so tall it’s sometimes hard, as tall as I am, to just toss a saddle up there like in years past. I wound up on the back porch with a cup of coffee and makin’ excuses for my lack of desire and ambition. One reason I was determined to ride was because of a lady doctor who came out here the day before to give me my annual physical. Yep, my insurance provider will send out a doc once a year to check me out. This lady was a city gal for sure. How did I know that? She was excited because she saw some “baby cows” running and having fun in the pasture. She noticed my horses and ask me if I rode them. “Sure,” I responded. “You do?” Yes ma’am why do you ask?” I asked. “Well, if there is an old one that is slow, it might be okay. Do you have an old one?” she pondered. I assured her that I was fine, after all she had just told me that she didn’t see to many fellows my age as active as I appeared to be. Those folks just don’t have a clue about cowboys and their lifestyles and that we may be able to handle a little more than some of the fellers that sit in a cubicle all day and play golf once in a while. Just sayin’!

I did a lot of pasture mowing yesterday and bouncin’ around in the tractor which, I’m sure, contributed to the way I felt this morning.



I recently mentioned that I had the “originals” of my cartoons in this paper. I want to get rid of some, so I offered if you found or remembered one that you liked you could send me $50 and I would sign it and pay the postage. Reach Hanks at onoranch@msn.com.

“I did a lot of pasture mowing yesterday and bouncin’ around in the tractor which, I’m sure, contributed to the way I felt this morning.”

George, an attorney in the Denver area, wanted a particular one that I did in 2003. Of course that was the only one I couldn’t find after searching for four hours. Sorry George.



Also, my Hoots from the ONO Ranch calendars for 2019 are available. They are $12 this year as postage rates have really gone up. No discounts for quantity. Sorry. Stay tuned, check yer cinch on occasion, double check for the location of yer “give a hoot”, and I’ll c. y’all, all y’all.

P.S. Cash or checks please, no plastic! ❖


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