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Interesting mail

TALES FROM THE ONO RANCH
Mad Jack Hanks
Wellington, Colo.

I enjoyed a recent column by Lee Pitts where he wrote about some of the more interesting gifts he had received from his fan base. Now gentle readers, I am not about to sit here and try to tell you that I have a fan base. Well, yes I do, sorta, I reckon from the mail I receive and some of the gifts I have been given. I have items sent to me and no idea who sent it as they wanted to be anonymous. Fortunately I haven’t received any bombs or poisons or anything like that. I did however, some years back find my mailbox full of dog poop! I always felt like the next trick would be a rattlesnake with the rattlers removed.

This past week I received an envelope with a story written by this old feller that sent it to me. He is a Canadian and has been around livestock all his life. Generally, he was “fussin” about folks that want to spend their lives complaining constantly.

As for him, he was born without his right arm from the elbow down. According to him, he always managed to get his work done and not always without incident. “Sometimes it’s hard to ride a buckin’ hoss with just one arm if ya ain’t a bronc rider by trade.”



He went on to sever ties with those who use others for their benefit and for those who think they might want to be cowboys without putting forth any effort. I think he pretty well got rid of some of the things that he needed to vent about. I agreed with him totally.

“I have items sent to me and no idea who sent it as they wanted to be anonymous. Fortunately I haven’t received any bombs or poisons or anything like that. I did, however, some years back find my mailbox full of dog poop!”

I also received a request for two calendars from an old cowboy here in Colorado. One was for him and the other for the woman he deeply loved and wanted to have her return to the nest. The short way around the barn is that he admitted he wasn’t good at writing love notes that would have any effect at all, so … Mad Jack would you write a little love note on her calendar for me and let her know how much I love her and need her back? The Love Doctor I am not but I did my darndest with what little knowledge I have about women.



Some folks think that I am pretty “handy” when it comes to being a “word smith” and drawin’ funny pitchers. Some don’t!

Yep, I have received a few letters over the years declaring how out of touch I am with reality. Their reality, not mine! I don’t consider myself to be a “moron” but there have been those that do simply because of my views about what it takes to be a solid citizen for America and what works for the good of the whole. We are going to be in a Mexican standoff over this border business and any progress towards finding common ground on most issues will just have to wait. That’s what it looks like to me in this new year. Well, there I go, jumpin’ completely off the subject like I can at times. I apologize. Stay tuned, check yer cinch on occasion, save your money and love yer mother-in-law if at all possible. I’ll c. y’all, all y’all. ❖


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