Dressing fit to kill | TheFencePost.com

Dressing fit to kill

Tales from the ONO Ranch
Mad Jack Hanks
Wellington, Colo.

I see folks today that are apparently in vogue that look like, well, they look like they crawled out of a trash bin.

I was in “Wally World” this morning to pick up some ink for my computer and I am always amazed to see what kind of an animal is going to wait on me. This morning it was a young lady who had so many “tats” on her body I found myself trying to decide what each one meant. The one between her breasts, of course, I couldn’t decide if it was a flower garden or an explosion of some sort. I first had to take my eye off of the stud protruding from her upper lip.

Where do they find these folks and why let them represent your business? Beats me.

Why do most of the professional football players and many college players want to look like Whoopi Goldberg? How much effort does one have to put into wearing cornrows and dread locks? I would think that your head would smell like a teenager’s sweaty socks! Yuck!

“Pull quote.”

Country music entertainers… what in the world is going on with that bunch? Poor Vince Gill and George Straight look like castaways from another time in space the way many of their counterparts come on stage. Ragged, ripped jeans, tattoos from head to toe, hair that looks like it was borrowed from a sheep dog, and some of the dirtiest looking T-shirts, real or not, make me want to just play like it ain’t real!

The problem is, it is real and they all seemingly try to outdo the other with ridiculous dressing. I used to think Porter Waggoner was a bit overdone with his sparkling, glittery, suits with his high water pants. Maybe not so much any more.

Where in the heck are we headed? We seem to just be giving everyone the finger and saying, “this is me, take it or leave it.” Mostly I think it is a matter of respect. Too many folks have absolutely no respect for others and aren’t ashamed to let it be known. Then again, one has to earn respect to receive it. I go bonkers when I see some gang banger in prison saying, “I cut his throat because he don’t respect me!”

I’m thinking, “What’s there to respect about anyone who goes out of their way to offend you and try and make you feel as if you don’t belong according to their personal standards?”

I tell ya gentle readers, I can’t decide if that person approaching me that’s dressed “fit to kill” is capable of doin’ just that. We live in a goofy world, and I understand why many of today’s teens are so apt to want to do drugs or drink just to get to another place in their mind.

My generation, I thought, had paved the way for folks coming on to have at least some common sense. When a little girl is handcuffed and removed from her classroom because she made a gun out of her finger and pointed it at folks that had bullied her, well, we’re off in the ditch for sure and there ain’t no tow truck right now big enough to pull us out. My, my, my …what’s the answer? You have your opinion and I have mine and I’ll keep mine to myself as to not offend anyone. We cut our own throats when we decided that “high tech” and social media would solve our problems. Some WalMarts in our area have robots taking inventory of merchandise. No kiddin’. That’s a fact Jack!

Stay tuned, check yer cinch on occasion, don’t make eye contact with the robots and I’ll c. y’all, all y’all. ❖


Mad Jack Hanks




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