Tales from the O-NO Ranch 1-18-10 | TheFencePost.com
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Tales from the O-NO Ranch 1-18-10

Mad Jack Hanks
Wellington, Colo.

Alice is a redhead, well, sort of red, kina’ orange, if you know what I mean. Actually, Alice is not her real name but she knows who she is.

I first saw Alice about a year and a half ago. I was on my motorcycle running through the foothills just west of Loveland, Colo. I just caught a brief look at her as she sat by her driveway. I was going too fast to stop and turn around and there was a pickum-up-truck right on my tail. I figured that Alice was more than likely already taken. She wasn’t, as I found out later. I sent one of my friends out to check up on her and he reported that he liked what he saw and thought I should get myself acquainted. I did. I spent a lot of time with Alice because we just seemed to hit it off. She was closer to my age than some of the others I had taken a shine to and I just felt like there just might be this lasting relationship. Alice never did nag or require a lot of attention and seemed to be ready to get up and go whenever the mood struck me.

Just recently Alice began to get a little more complicated than I had expected her to. All of a sudden, gentle readers, Alice needed this and Alice needed that and I just had not prepared myself to have to start spending money on her as the economy is tough on me just like some of you guys. I thought enough of Alice to spend whatever it took to get her on her feet again. You know, make her happy and give her a reason to be her old self. I have to tell ya though, it took more than a few dollars and lots and lots of attention to get to where we are today.

Alice and I spent nearly the whole day just knockin’ around outside today and moving snow drifts that really needed to be moved. Her real name is Allis Chalmers. Yep, she’s a tractor and I just love her to death. She starts every time in any type of weather but she lost her hydraulic pump for the loader the other day and I have had a tough time finding a pump that would work on that ol’ gal. It’s too complicated to get into but trust me when I tell you I just about lost my religion over Alice and her pump. I think that I have it going my way now as I was able to run for about 4 hours without any problems and I’m gonna’ call that a win!

I once said that redheaded kids and dingo dogs were not to be trusted. I still hold onto that belief and I’m not real sure yet how I feel about redheaded tractors.

Stay tuned, check yer cinch on occasion and I’ll c. ya.


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