Tales from the O-NO Ranch 9-21-09 | TheFencePost.com
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Tales from the O-NO Ranch 9-21-09

Mad Jack Hanks
Wellington, Colo.

Well, gentle readers, we have all witnessed recently what a mess our government officials seem to be in as they wrestle with heath care and all the infighting that goes with it.

Guess what? It happens here at the local level. I just got off the phone with a woman from our local humane society or animal shelter. That’s the place where I got my wonder dog Clancey. Yep, paid a hundred dollars for him last year and with that I received a five dollar collar and a coupon for 10 pounds of free dog food. Enough to last him about two days as he weighed 110 pounds!

Here is my story. In my county all pets are required to have rabies shots and you are required to pay five bucks for each and every pet you have for the license. This past spring when it was time for ole Clancey to get a rabies shot I went to one of our local clinics only to find out that the vet would not give the shot unless the dog was examined first. Well, I like to keep my business local but I wasn’t about to pay $75 or more for an exam and a shot when the dog was perfectly healthy. I took him on down the road to another vet clinic only to find the vet there was extremely busy but the girl at the counter told me she could sell me the vaccine and I could give the shot myself and it only cost $5.

“It’s not illegal for you to give the shot yourself Mr. Hanks, what is the woman’s name that told you that?” she demanded to know. This was asked of me by the woman at the animal shelter. “Heck, I don’t know, I didn’t ask her name.”

“Have I done anything illegal?”

“The State of Colorado will not recognize your license,” she barked.

“That’s not what I asked, did I do anything illegal?” I asked once more.

“I’m not here to argue with you Mr. Hanks, I grew up on a farm and I understand your situation, (more calmly now) I can send you a list of places where you can take your dog on Saturday morning between 8 and 12 and get a shot for $15,” she offered.

“He don’t need a shot, he’s already had his rabies shot. I don’t care if the state of Colorado recognizes his license or not, he ain’t gonna’ get another shot unless you want to send someone out here to the ranch to give him one!”

“Mr. Hanks there is rabies in every county in this area and we have to be sure that if your dog bites someone that they don’t get rabies.”

“Ma’am, if he bites somebody it will be because they were on my place at night when they shouldn’t be and they ain’t gonna’ get rabies cause he’s had his shot!”

“You are breaking the law!” she blurted out.

“Ma’am, if the state of Colorado and the Humane Society ain’t happy with how I take care of my dog, why don’t you come pick him up and put him back in the shelter?”

(long silence)

“We don’t want your dog,” she pleaded.

“Tell ya what,” I offered, “I’ve been invited by a lady vet to a BBQ this weekend and I’ll ask her if I’ve broken the law. If she says yes, I will call you back and apologize, how’s that?”

(long silence)

“Mr. Hanks, I’ll try to see if I can get this license extended for three more years and if I can’t I’ll be calling you back.”

“That will be fine, but this dog ain’t gonna get another rabies shot for three years and that’s my final answer. Have a nice weekend, will ya?”

“You too”, she melted away.

End of story. Stay tuned, check yer cinch on occasion and I’ll c. ya.

P.S. I immediately called the vet clinic and was assured that I had done absolutely nothing wrong.


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