"What do the simple folk do?" So goes the line from the musical Camelot. Non-agricultural folk sometimes sound a bit like a gaggle of King Arthurs and Queen Guineveres when they expound on agricultural topics. A shameless parody, we'll rechristen King Arthur as City Guy, and Queen Guinevere as City Gal. With apologies to Alan Jay Lerner (book and lyrics) and Frederick Loewe (music).

The musical question: 

What Do The Country Folk Do?

CITY GAL

What do the country folk do

To help them escape when they're blue?

The cowboy who is roping, the cowgirl who still hopes

The rancher who is calving; for a calf he gropes

When they're beleaguered and plagued

These folk do not seem to be fazed

However do they muddle through and cope with their lot?

Oh what do country folk do we do not?

 CITY GUY

It's hard to explain for they don't really tell

They lift their doldrums in quite skillful ways

When the weather's bad, they ponder things to quell

And pondering sure lightens up their days

And that's what country folk do

So they say  CITY GAL

What else do the country folk do

To keep up courage and stay true

The youngsters and the grown folk

Who mosey to and fro

Have ways known to country folk

We town folk don't know

When down in the dumps begins

What keeps country folk wearing grins?

What puzzling rural custom keeps country on the go

Oh, what do country folk do?

Do you know?

 CITY GUY

Once I saw a cowboy riding on his horse

Singing in a voice of twangy sighs

When I asked, he said that singing to the cows

Was soothing to the bovine beasts somehow

And that's what country folk do

I surmise 

CITY GAL

What else do country folk do?

They must have a routine or two

It appears that every day they work in common dirt

While city folk don't soil our hands for it might hurt

How then, I wonder, do they

Manage to keep goblins at bay

Do they have country cunning that you haven't mentioned yet

Oh, what do country folk do to forget? CITY GUY

Often, so I'm told, they work and work some more

They irrigate and harvest hay and fence

They calve the cows; herd the sheep on the ranch

The effort is astounding to behold

And that's what country folk do

So I'm told

CITY GAL

What else do the country folk do

To help them get past being blue? CITY GUY

They sit around and laugh at what city folk would do

And that's what country folk do

CITY GAL

Oh, no, really?

 CITY GUY

I have it on the best authority.

 BOTH

Yes, that's what country folk do! ❖