The cow committee | TheFencePost.com

The cow committee

On the Edge of Common Sense
Baxter Black, DMV

Once upon a time at the start of all creation

Angels sat upon a cloud. An odd conglomeration

Of buckaroos from near and far but not there from the city.

Their job; to build a brand new beast. They were the Cow Committee.

Support Local Journalism


“Now me, I’d like some floppy ears,” suggested Texas Jake.

“Floppy ears would freeze plum off on the Powder or the Snake!”

“Up north we need some curly hair,” said Colorado Bill,

“Hide that’s tight and hair that’s thick to ward against the chill.”

“Hold yer horses, one and all,” said Omaha Eugene,

“Nebraska needs a fleshy cow; a real corn machine!”

“She’d waste away!” cried Tucson Bob, “What we need’s a hump.

One who’ll live on tumbleweeds and run from clump to clump.”

‘How ‘bout horns?” said Oakdale Pete. “Don’t need’em in Des Moines.”

“We’ll make some with and some without and some with tenderloins.”

“Some with sheaths that drag the grass and some so dadgum tall

To hear her calf down on the ground she’d have to place a call!”

“I’d like’m roan,” said Shorthorn Mike. “No, black,” said Angus Tink.

“White or red,” said Hereford Hank, “I’d even take’m pink!”

“Whatever suits you tickles me,” said Juan from Mexico.

“I second that,” said Crossbred Jack, “Just make’m so they grow.”

They made some white. They made some blue. They made some orange and spotted.

They never made a green one but they made’m tall and squatted.

In every shape and every size but no one had decided

How to make the perfect cow; on that they were undivided.

This went on for days and days, in fact, it never ended.

Each time they reached some middle ground the project was amended.

They still meet from time to time and argue with their leaders.

The Cow Committee carries on … they’re now the purebred breeders. ❖


Support Local Journalism

Readers like you make the Fence Post’s work possible. Your financial contribution supports our efforts to deliver quality, locally relevant journalism.

Now more than ever, your support is critical to help us keep our community informed about the evolving coronavirus pandemic and the impact it is having locally. Every contribution, however large or small, will make a difference.

Each donation will be used exclusively for the development and creation of increased news coverage.

 


Start a dialogue, stay on topic and be civil.
If you don't follow the rules, your comment may be deleted.