Hanks: Inspired by that pink bunny | TheFencePost.com

Hanks: Inspired by that pink bunny

I always seem to get up tired. I can faintly remember times in the past, way back, in fact when I could rise and feel rested and ready to go.

Nope, not anymore. Not at 77 years of age and I would bet ya that most folks my age or even close to it don’t feel all that rested when they get up in the morning.

I couldn’t sleep late if I wanted. Even on dance night when I might get to bed between 11:30 and midnight or even later, I always am awake around six or so and up shortly after that.

Too many mornings on the ranch I reckon. You know, chores to be done. However, I woke up the other morning and after making my bed, feeding my ponies, having a cup of coffee and a quick breakfast, I put on a load of laundry and went out to water my trees (20) and flowers.

“Pullquote text

Shazammm!! All of a sudden I got this incredible burst of energy. It made me think of that cute little pink rabbit with the sunglasses who is always beating on a drum. He never ever slows down or quits. Nope he just keeps steppin’ out with that cute little tale bouncin’ along behind him while he beats that drum.

As I watered more and more trees I decided maybe it was time to get under the house in the crawl space as I do this time every year and check for water leaks.

Oh yeah, while I’m under there I can put out some of those insecticide bombs to kill all the spiders and whatever else is living down there. The crawl space is 36-inches high in some places and lower in others and the house is 70-feet long.

It’s a manufactured home and the crawl space is a little under 1,900 square feet. Soooo, I turned off the water, changed into some old clothes, got my flashlight, put on my knee pads, mask and safety glasses, bombs and headed under the house after I plugged in the lights rigged up to help with the lighting.

I crawl like a crab to the far end, set off one bomb, hustle (as fast as a 77-year-old crab can) to the center of the house and set off another bomb all the while checking for water leaks. No leaks, thank goodness.

I crawled back to the opening where I went under and set off the last canister and got out from under the house as fast as a 77-year-old cowboy (crab) can.

Gentle readers, I gotta’ tell ya, I’m pert near proud of me by the time I got back to fresh air and closed up the hatch to keep the poison down where it belongs.

I’m outta’ breath by now so I get another cup of coffee, settle down on the back deck to regroup. Now it’s back to watering the trees and flowers. I’m so proud of me, it’s almost disgusting.

As I am watering this one tree, I notice what appears to be the ear piece off of a pair of glasses. I reach down and pick it up.

We don’t need any trash laying around now do we? WHAT’S THIS? Low and behold it turns out to be a pair of eyeglasses that I lost over three years ago. I gave almost $400 for that eye exam, glasses and sunglasses. I assumed that I had misplaced them or left them somewhere and couldn’t remember where.

Man, I was proud of me by now as they didn’t seem to have suffered any real damage and I am wearing them as I write now. That pink bunny really got me going and going and going and look at all that I accomplished.

I don’t know how many more years I will find the energy or courage to go under the house to just take a look, make any repairs or put out insecticide, but I did so just the other day. By the way, that spider spray sure “nuff” does the job. There were no webs under the house but one small one as I put out canisters this time last year and my house was full of webs underneath.

After finding my eye glasses I remembered those nice prescription sunglasses I bought at the same time. Where are they? I don’t remember where I put them or what I did with them.

I spent an hour just looking for them. Maybe I’ll have to start looking under the trees. Hummmm?

Speaking of prescriptions. Did you hear about the lady that ask the druggist for some poison? “What are you going to do with it?” he asked.

“I’m going to kill my husband,” she replied. “Well, I can’t let you have it if that’s what you plan to do with it.”

She reached in her purse, pulled out a photo of her husband in bed with the druggist’s wife and handed it to him.

“Oh, he replied, I didn’t know you had a prescription!”

Stay tuned, check yer cinch on occasion, expect the unexpected and I’ll c. y’all, all y’all.❖

Mad Jack Hanks

See more