Hanks: Whipping a dead horse | TheFencePost.com

Hanks: Whipping a dead horse

I gotta’ tell ya gentle readers that complaining about the wind living where I do is like whipping a dead horse. Nothing is going to change. I know for a fact that the wind is blowing harder a few miles up the road in Wyoming. How do I know that? It just always does.

Now Little Miss Martha and I knew that we were moving into windy country when we bought this place almost 24 years ago. Some years are not so windy as it has been here of late but this is not one of those years.

I’m not like most of my buddies in that I can sleep easier when the wind is blowing than not. Don’t know why, I just can. It, for some reason, is comforting to me unless it’s during tornado season and that’s a horse of a different color. Speaking of horses, a good many years ago (I’ve told this story once before, but it fits) I had been invited to a branding down at Colorado Springs on one of Bob Norris’ ranches. It is always pretty much a community affair where a lot of folks will come out to the branding and big feed to watch cowboys at work, those who think they are cowboys and those who want to be. There were a few guys from the Air Force Academy and a mix of all sorts of humanoids. I, at this time, was helping on one of six flanking crews (wrestling calves to be branded). There was this old feller there whom they all called “windy” because he was spinning some really wild tales about his adventures as a cowboy.

We all took it in stride and just sort of rolled our eyes when it was obvious the truth was being stretched until it was about to snap.

“We all took it in stride and just sort of rolled our eyes when it was obvious the truth was being stretched until it was about to snap.”

Being the smart mouth that I can be at times, I finally called him on one of his wildest stories and at the present I can’t remember exactly what he was spinning but I wasn’t buying. I challenged him in a playful way without being mean about it. Now “Windy” took offense to what I threw at him but I didn’t get any blow back from him at that time. “Windy” had gotten the word that he could drag some calves to the fire if he wanted. Trust me children, “Windy” wanted! He rode past me and almost bumped me with his horse as he rode into the melee of calves. Of course, we all were glued to him to see how he would handle this situation. Keeping in mind there were five other men dragging calves at the same time. This was a big deal! “Windy” throws a big head loop when all the other ropers are roping the back legs to make it easier on the wrestling crews and guess what? Ol’ Windy” ropes two calves at the same time and starts a’draggin’ towards the crew I was on. As he rode past me he looked at me as if to say, “I bet ya can’t top that!”

If you’ve ever flanked calves you know how hard it is to try and get not one, but two big calves on the ground that have been roped around the neck. We got’er done but it was a chore and “Windy” all this time thought he was showing us how it ought to be done.

We all know that he caught those calves by accident but he wasn’t about to let on. Whipping a dead horse was not ever gonna’ stop ol’ “Windy” from tellin’ those tall tales, especially now that he had just created another one! Stay tuned, check yer cinch on occasion and remember as Dizzy Dean (famous baseball pitcher) said, “it ain’t braggin’ if ya done it”! I’ll c. y’all, all y’all. ❖


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Mad Jack Hanks

Rain and the ridiculous


Yes RAIN! The answer to so many prayers and it has been such a good slow and necessary rain. Looks as if I will be able to kick a few pairs out for the summer…

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