Aggie Snicker Stickers
Spring has sprung and farmers are headed to their fields with all types and brands of farm machinery. I’ve found it interesting, and have observed down through the years, that farmers seem to gravitate towards specific brands or colors of farm machinery. Brand loyalty is king.
There are folks who will hardly buy anything that isn’t green, red, blue, orange, silver, lime, etc. And, they are so convinced that “their color” is superior to others that they do a lot of free word of mouth and “word-of-sight” advertising for their favorite brand.
In recognition of that kind of brand loyalty, I’ve created what I call “Aggie Snicker Stickers” for sticking on bumpers and windshields. From now on farmers can proudly display their brand loyalty with these “Aggie Snicker Stickers:”
• My Wife Says I’m A Deere Man.
• Bush-Hog is not Bush-League
• A New Idea is Better Than a New Anything Else
• Charleton Ain’t My Favorite Hesston.
• Deutz Is My Choitz
• Yetter’s Better
• Nothin’s Neater Than a Zetor
• My Claas is Better Than Santa
• Rhino is Fine-o
• Wouldn’t Take A Million For My Brillion
• Honor Thy Fauver and Thy Mauver
• My Tye Drills Better Than My Dentist’s
• I Enjoy Being Badgered.
• I Dig My Danuser
• Kin’t Get Along Without My Kinze
• My Big Ox Does More Than Paul Bunyan’s
• Mixing Feed’s No Grind With My Peerless
• My New Holland is Still Good Old.
• You “Ought-a” Buy a Kubota
• Case-IH Sets the Pace
• My Massey is Classy
• The Pride in Land Pride is Justified
• The Cab of My Allis is My Palace
• Gleaner: The Meaner Combine
• Caterpillar: The Right Track in Power
Well, that ain’t all, but it’s a good start.
I started this “old” list last week. So, I’ll add the following to that list:
Old pilots never die, they just go to a higher plane.
Old policemen never die, they just cop out.
Old printers never die, they’re just not the type.
Old quarterbacks never die, they just pass away.
Old schools never die, they just lose their principals.
Old sewage workers never die, they just waste away.
Old skateboarders never die, they just come off their wheels.
Old accountants never die, they just lose their balance.
Old archers never die, they just bow and quiver.
Old architects never die, they just lose their structure.
Old bankers never die, they just lose interest.
Old basketball players never die, they just go on dribbling.
Old bookkeepers never die, they just lose their figures.
Old bosses never die, much as you want them to.
Old cashiers never die, they just check out.
Old chauffeurs never die, they just lose their drive.
Old chemists never die, they just fail to react.
Old janitors never die, they just kick the bucket.
Old deans never die, they just lose their faculties.
Old doctors never die, they just lose their patients.
Old electricians never die, they just lose contact.
Three boys are standing around talking about their fathers — trying to one up each other.
The first one says to the others, “My dad is so fast, he can shoot an arrow on one side of the field, run to the other side and set up a target in time for it to hit!”
The second boys replies, “That’s nothing. My dad can shoot a bullet and run to the other side of the field and set up the target in time for it to hit!”
The third boy retorts smugly, ”You guys are feeble. My dad works for the government and he is so fast that he can get off at 5 and be home at 2!”
We fed 21 hungry and gabby old geezers this morning at the Old Boars’ Breakfast.
Words of wisdom: “We’d be taller if we hadn’t stopped growing.” Have a good ‘un.
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