Quirky ag education

My last two columns have been an attempt to help new column readers better understand why I am the quirky way I am today in old age. 

It mostly traces back to my growing up in the 1940s, ’50s, and ’60s in a community of diversified farmers and livestock producers who had to tough time making ends meet. Sort of like today come to think about it.

So, my early agricultural education came about mainly from observing how things were done — both on the Yield farm by my pappy, ol’ Czar E. Yield, and by our hard-scrabble neighbors. 

So, here’s some of what my early ag education wuz:

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Those were the days when hogs were commonly considered as “mortgage lifters.” Every farm family had a herd of hogs both for family consumption of pork and lard and for the profit they usually generated at the local auction barn. And, naturally, pork profit wuz largely dependent on the reproductive performance of the gilts, sows and boars.

Well, on the Yield farm, pappy Czar, wuz unhappy with the reproductive performance of his hog herd. It just didn’t turn a profit. Too few piglets were being born. So, he reluctantly decided to liquidate his herd and repopulate with entirely new bloodlines. And, that’s what he did.

He searched high and low and traveled all over southeast Kansas and southwest Missouri for better pork bloodlines. And, the aftermath of that search wuz some gilts and boars that greatly improved the reproductive performance in the Yield herd.

When those new gilts laid down and had their first piglets, ol’ Czar wuz really pleased. More than 50% of them had multiple births. 

The boar he bought wuz named Ferdinand. And the gilt who had the biggest litter of piglets wuz named Liza. So, Czar retained a boar pig from the litter for future breedings. He named that young boar Ferdiliza.

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Southeast Kansas is known for its thin soils. Back in the days of my youth the region’s farmers tried a lot of ways to improve the soils on their farms. It wuz common to spread manure on fields. Many others raised green manure cover crops like sweet clover to plow under and put some organic matter into the clay. A few applied the new  synthetic fertilizers that were coming on the market.

But, one of our neighbors had a very creative way to add fertility to his farm’s fields. He had a feedlot for finishing out steers. And, he wuz very particular about the steers he bought to feed out. Unlike most cattle feeders, he didn’t buy the slick-coated, shiny steers. He always bought the shaggy-coated “mud ball” steers whose hair coat  and tail wuz covered in balls of dried manure and dirt. The bigger and most the better.

When I asked him about his steer procurement strategy, he told me, “Milo, every steer I buy is probably carrying a hundred pounds of manure in its hair coat. Collectively, when they all shed off each spring, I’ve imported more new soil and fertility that I lose through normal erosion.”

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I observed that another cattleman in our neighborhood had a novel way to make quality improvement in his cattle herd. First, he had a nice herd of Dexter cows. Then he bought a big, tall, lanky Chianina bull. 

His purpose of that genetic strategy of breeding Dexters to a Chianina wuz to add stretch and length to the calves. And, it worked! After all the calves had been delivered by a fence-stretcher, they were always a lot longer throughout their lives. 

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Another neighbor developed a niche market for his poultry flock. He developed specially bred, free-range, organic chickens. He crossed his hens with a homing pigeon. He called them “Homing Chickens.” The key to his profitability wuz that the organic chickens he sold flew to the customer and delivered themselves — and the bill wuz attached to one of their legs. 

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It’s been a spell since I mentioned my new shop/man cave that’s been under construction. The interior work is the volunteer handiwork of my son-in-law Harley Ryder. His labor agreement included free Miller Lite and party rights at any moment of his choosing.

Well, the shop isn’t finished, but it is close enuf to finished for me to host a “welcome to my man cave” party for the old geezer gang here in Riley. 

That event took place Monday evening, while I’m batching ol’ Nevah and her friend Diane, are on a riverboat cruise of the Snake and Columbia Rivers in the Pacific Northwest.

Total attendance wuz 14. Menu wuz hamburgers with all the trimmings and beverages of choice. There wuz a birthday boy in the crowd, too, and one hardcore card player who fought me in seven point jackpot pitch until well after the others left. 

As the old saying goes, a good time wuz had by all.

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Words of wisdom for the week: “The best bartenders are those who can work staggered hours.”

Have a good ‘un.